This title reflects my feelings regarding the actions of one of my children. After I discussed said actions with my sister, QA2, we both determined that we would have never done that. Never. Ever.
When I tell my children to go into time out they do not comply. In fact, Middle for the most part, screams "NO!". It is only when I threaten to remove his Cars shirt does he head for his room. It is always a battle.
I don't know if it was respect or fear, probably both, but I would never have dreamed of speaking that way to my parents. Ever. The thought didn't enter my mind. We knew the rules, respect was number one. They spanked us, certainly not to excess, but we were spanked. And nothing brought the hand onto my bum faster than a flippant remark. I am a quick study.
I know being a parent in this day and age is not easy, mom's work, everyone is stressed out about money, etc. But, I am the parent and what I say goes. It may be archaic and for sure if King Daddy were standing behind me he would say I was completely ridiculous. But you know what? I am trying to raise respectful children in a completely disrespectful world. And I mean that in the truest sense of the word. Girls are wearing makeup and thongs at a most inappropriate age, sex is nothing more than a hand shake and all of it means that there is a lack of respect for ones own body. So I am super big on respect, all aspects of respect. And the fact that my children do not comply with me when I send them to time out, is something that I will continue to work on.
I watch Super Nanny and Nanny 911, read Parents magazine and listen to people who I consider to be wise. I get a lot of good tips from all of these mediums. When watching the nanny shows, I sit proud as a peacock that our family is not as dysfunctional as that family. The one I need to work on the most? Yelling. Yelling does not help at all. It exacerbates every situation, particularly with Middle. The second one? Patience, I have no patience.
Am I a bad mother? Quite the opposite. I am a GREAT mother. But I am human, I am flawed, but in my flaws I love my children fiercely and only want what is best for them. Teaching them respect for me will undoubtedly serve them well throughout their entire lives. I should know, I speak from experience. I will continue to work on this with them and one day it will be better.
What is that saying about being a boss and a friend? It never works, I view parenthood very much the same way.
Author's note: My children are completely compliant, respectful and polite while in the care of other adults and I know that most children are.