Thursday, March 25, 2010

I've backed myself into a corner

And I didn't even know I was doing it.

With each of my pregnancies I begin to wonder how I can change my life to be more available for my baby.  But then reality sets in and the understanding of how there is not a lot of things that I can change.  I, like most women, went out and got a job and advanced my career.  Now my family depends on my income and there is no changing that.  We have been working on getting our finances in order and are doing a great job at that, but the fact remains there isn't much change I can make to my career as we need the money.  At least for now.  Maybe over time I could do something different for less money but for now we will need to remain status quo.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

You traded spending time and raising your children for monetary gains and wordly posessions.

Now you have to live with your decision.

Betsy, short for Elizabeth, formally known as Esther said...

LOL! Thank you anonymous for your WISE opinion!!!

Kate said...

Well, from one working mom to another, we both know it will all fall into place. That's how life works.

And it has nothing to do with trading time with your children for monetary or worldly gain. It has everything to do with making the tough choices we all face about how to best provide for that family.

Ok, off to work for monetary gain, AKA -- putting food on the table for my kids!

Love,
Your loud-mouthed friend,
Kate

Anonymous said...

This is for Anonymous: As a mother, you make a lot of sacrifices but I doubt any of them are at the expense of family or children. Reality is that families do often need the two incomes to make ends meet. Studies will show that kids grow up just fine in a home with working parents. It comes down to quality of time spent with the kids, not quantity. Every family makes memories for their kids. and that is what you do not want to trade for anything.

Ann Campbell said...

I find the debate between working and stay-home moms so tiring. We all make the choices we deem best for our families. The fact that anonymous #1 judges others without even knowing them (because obviously they DO NOT know you) speaks volumes. Maybe anon should be more concerned with what they are TEACHING their children instead of how much time they spend with them.

Stephanie Patterson said...

I absolutely, positively hate it when someone criticizes the fact that I am a working mother. When I complain about my job, my stay-at-home mom friends say, "Why don't you just quit?" I wish it were that easy. I wish I could afford to stay at home, but that just isn't an option for us.

I think that whoever posted that comment anonymously is not only a coward if they can't give their name, but has no right judging ANYONE else's situation. It was a shallow, ignorant comment, and I have no problem saying so with my name attached to it!

KathyLikesPink said...

Hey anonymous, it's real easy to make snarky comments when you don't have to step up to the plate and identify yourself.

Here's something to consider: Judge not lest ye be judged.

hellofromkym said...

Maybe Anonymous needs to spend more time researching
PSalms 31:10-31 The Virtuous Woman
Whether you have been pegged 'Stay at home' or you are a working mom it is all the same deal. you are taking care of home and your man and many times Never having time for/to yourself. Betsy is the modern day Virtuous Woman no more or less than any stay at home mom. We are all Super Moms! Yay Team... :)

Happy Valley Mom said...

Dear Anonymous,
When I see/ hear comments like that I am reminded of the book The Red Tent. This book is set on biblical times, and during the time of polygamy. It's a time in our history when one would expect woman to work against each. But it wasn't. Woman valued each's others skill, talents and intelligence. They worked together not against each other.
Today woman don't always do that. I don't know if it because of ads on TV or what , but we compete and put each other down. How many times have you walked into a party and sized up the other women in the room, and began putting them down. " Can you believe she wore that blouse, how much has she gained? or what a b*****she is."
Anonymous you doing that exact same thing. Instead of validating Talbots ability to provide for her family,you make a value judgement. Instead of offering support, and acknowledgement on how hard it is to a woman with children, you place judgement.

We need to support and appreciate each other, not judge each other.

Shelley Clough said...

I am a proud working mother. I married the man that I love.. knowing that 2 incomes would be needed. We work as a team. When the children were small we would take turns taking time off to care for them. Our jobs are equally important. I am proud of the fact that we can balance the 2. It has made our marriage stronger.(married 17 yrs this year) My children are involved in all different activities. Our time is our children's. I am very proud of what we have accomplished together. The house gets cleaned ..the bills get paid ..the laundry gets done. We work together. My children are soon to be 14 and 16. They are in advanced classes getting great grades. They have not given us any trouble. I know all their friends, most of them call me mom. We choose our own paths in life. You do what you have to do and what works best for you. It is not our job to judge other people and the path that they take.

Betsy... keep doing what you are doing.. You have beautiful ...healthy.. happy children.. GREAT JOB..
Love Ya
Shelley